Personal Work

The worry isn't random. It's guarding something.

Everyone keeps telling you to stop overthinking, as if there's a switch you've been refusing to flip.

You've tried the switch. You've also rehearsed tomorrow's conversation tonight, start to finish, twice, with revisions. You know it doesn't help. You'll run it again anyway.

So before anything else, here's what I want you to know: there's nothing wrong with you, and there's a way through this. I've walked it with a lot of people. The worry has a reason, and the reason is the way out.

What the work is

You've tried arguing with the worry. It doesn't argue back. It just waits, and it's more patient than you are.

So we do something different. We stop fighting it and get curious about it.

A worry that gets fought grows. A worry that gets understood loosens its grip.

And once you can see what it's been guarding, you get a say in the matter. That's the new part. Up until now, it's been deciding for you.

What changes

The energy comes back. All the energy that went into scanning and bracing is yours again.

You still have hard things to do. They just stop feeling so enormous. An email can be an email. A decision can be a decision. A day can ask things of you without taking the whole room.